Assault: Adam Schefter Takes Us Through His Legendary Tweet

As a Big J, a recurring guest, and one of the best in the biz, there is very little down time for ESPN NFL Insider Adam Schefter. Luckily for us, he was able to squeeze some time in to kick it back with Mr. Cat and Mr. Commenter at the NFL Combine in Indianapolis earlier this week. The trio discussed a handful of topics, including duties of being a Big J, his thoughts on potential landing spots for big players as we approach NFL Free Agency, and more. But let's be real. The moment this interview got confirmed, there was one thing on everybody's mind...

Assault.

And Mr. Cat and Mr. Commenter did not waste any time with this, as it was introduced right off the top of the interview:

Mr. Cat: OK, we now welcome on one of our favorite recurring guests, live from Indianapolis, it is our friend Adam Schefter. The Adam Schefter podcast, also an insider on NBA/NFL... Assault.

Adam Schefter: Assault. We're off. I figured we'd start there. 

Mr. Cat: I mean, it's been on my mind. I was actually thinking about this before you got here. If I could sit down and talk to anyone regarding that situation, I wouldn't talk to Myles Garrett. I wouldn't talk to Mason Rudolph and say, hey, how'd that feel? Not the Pouncey's, not Baker. I just want to know, Adam Schefter, assault. 

Adam Schefter: What was it that night? 

Mr. Cat and Mr. Commenter: Battery.

Adam Schefter: Next time, I will change it.

Mr. Cat: Were you as upset as you watched that as the Assault tweet made me think you were?

Adam Schefter: No, basically you're watching it, and the only think I could think of was, he just assaulted that guy.

Mr. Cat: Assault. 

Adam Schefter: He assaulted him! That's what it is!

Mr. Commenter: Can you say that again? That was perfect. 

Adam Schefter: Assault!

Mr. Cat: I think the period is really what set it over the top, too. Assault period. Just something about it. That tweet might be my favorite tweet from 2019. 

Adam Schefter: You know, the funny thing is, I haven't seen it show up anywhere since then. Like, nobody's tweeted it at me. This is the first time that anybody's brought it up since then. 

Mr. Commenter: You can apply the tweet, "Assault." to just about anything that happens online. Anytime someone dunks on Rov*ll, "Assault." is just a great reply to it. It's like something you always need to have in your back pocket. 

Mr. Cat: And credit to you. I think that five years ago, Adam Schefter probably wouldn't have had fun with it. But you did right away. You kind of took the piss out of it, which was great. I guess that makes it funnier, where it's like, yeah, it's assault. 

Adam Schefter: Again, I've been through this enough to know that it's not going to go away, that it's going to follow me around. And so now we'll just have to come up with something again in the future, whatever that may be, to supplant assault.

Assault. Assault. Assault. Assault. Assault. Assault. Assault. Assault. Assault. Assault. Assault. Assault. Assault. Assault. Assault. Assault. Assault. Assault. Assault. Assault. Assault. Assault. Assault. Assault. Assault. Assault. Assault. Assault. Assault. Assault. Assault. Assault. Assault. Assault. Assault. Assault. Assault. Assault. Assault. Assault. Assault. Assault. Assault. Assault. Assault. Assault. Assault. Assault. Assault. Assault. Assault. Assault. Assault. Assault. Assault. Assault. Assault. Assault. Assault. Assault.

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That right there, folks, is a total of 60 appearances of the word "Assault" in a row. The word was exclaimed 60 times during the interview. Just an epic performance from Mr. Cat, Mr. Commenter, and Adam Schefter. Little did he know at the time, but a tweet so simple as seven letters long, one word, and one punctuation mark took the world by storm the night of Nov. 14, 2019. And as the Big J said, he knows it's not going away any time soon. But props to him for approaching the topic without any hard feelings. As crazy of a situation as that fight was, at least we got this to come out of it.