Stella Blue Coffee | Miss Peaches Cold Brew Now AvailableSHOP NOW

Advertisement

Tyreek Hill Has Been Traded To The Dolphins Roughly 10 Seconds After He Was Rumored To Be On The Trading Block

So that was the quickest negotiations in NFL history. One minute Tyreek Hill's agent is being given permission to seek a trade, the next Tyreek is taking his talents to South Beach and getting paid more than any receiver to do so. Meanwhile the Chiefs get a bunch of draft picks and give the other AFC West teams a chance to catch up even more now that they don't have to stop a freakshow with wheels AND hands because Patrick Mahomes' cap hit will finally match his skills.

It seems a little cruel that the Football Gods couldn't have just let this trade happen without getting the hopes up of millions of Jets fans before chokeslamming them through a flaming table #BillsMafia style. But that's what those motherfuckers have been doing pretty much every year since Joe Willie Namath came through on his guarantee in Super Bowl III. Plus I imagine those reports just so happening to leak right before the trade went through was a last minute attempt for the Chiefs to get as good a package as possible for Tyreek Hill, which was reportedly this.

Before Tyreek hit the Jets with the peace sign.

Advertisement

As for the team that got him, let's go live to Dolphins Superfan Frank The Tank to see his reaction to this super exciting move!

Never change, Tank. Actually change during Mets season but remain the same for every other team. 

However like Frank said, if Tua can't move the ball better with the Dolphins signing the best left tackle and maybe free agent on the market along with having two of the most electric playmaking wide receivers in the NATIONAL. FOOTBALL. LEAGUE. Tuanon is going to have to work overtime to convince the world he is #good.

Even though speed kills in the NFL, something tells me we are going to be seeing a lot of bubble screens and crossing routes with those two instead of Patrick Mahomes rainbow moon bombs that leave the TV screen...

Advertisement

I was about to say that the Chiefs no longer being able to run that play where Tyreek Hill goes in motion then runs a quick out on 4th & 1 feels like a good thing for the other 31 NFL teams. Then I remembered this sick son of a bitch is now in charge down in Miami, so God know what superbrain is cooking up for Hill and Waddle right now.

Now let's keep these moves coming because I am officially addicted to NFL blockbusters. I don't care who they are or where they go. But I need more stars on the move pronto (preferably not to Philly or Dallas though).