Nick Wright Called The Suns "Gimmicky" and "Unfair" For Scoring At Will On Luka Doncic, And Absolutely Would Not Let His Awful Take Go

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First Things First Fox Sports personality Nick Wright is a hot-take machine these days, and while he does raise some fair points from time to time, he's inching closer to Skip Bayless/Stephen A. Smith territory than anyone might be willing to admit. You know, creating nonsensical arguments out of thin air based on pseudo-psychological analysis tinged with a conspiratorial flair and impassioned oration just to get a rise out of people, MAKE FOLKS ANGRY, and yes, drive ratings.

Case in point: This fucking nonsense Wright spewed about the Phoenix Suns relentlessly going after Luka Doncic on pick-and-rolls, because, you know, they actually want to maximize their chances of winning in the NBA playoffs.

Here's the main snippet of what Wright said in case you don't have the stomach to watch the grisly footage above:

"It's almost a little unfair what they are doing. […] If you are truly the best team in basketball, beat them straight up, not with this gimmicky stuff."

Give me a break man. Seriously? UNFAIR to target someone who straight-up can't stop you when you're trying to advance in the postseason? Can you imagine anyone else making this argument on behalf of any other player? Look, I'm all for the era of outspokenness, humanizing athletes in every way possible and all that jazz. But we're talking about on-court tactics and pure performance here. If something is working for a team and leads to winning basketball, they're going to keep doing it until the opponent adjusts.

This is like saying, "Oh that damn Kareem Abdul-Jabbar! Gosh golly, when he was earning all those all-time NBA scoring achievements and winning championships, he just wouldn't QUIT IT with that skyhook shot! What a gimmicky way to score! That's so unfair. He's wayyyyyy too efficient at it! Geez, real original Kareem!! Find a different release point!!!!"

Am I right or am I right? I'm right. I know. And Wright is wrong.

But no matter how wrong Wright was, he couldn't fucking STOP himself from doubling down on this preposterous discourse.

THEN, when people started rightfully putting him on blast, Wright resorted to calling out the local media in Arizona for being too soft on the Suns…?

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This guy can't stop, won't stop. Because after all that shit, Wright seemed to attempt a backtrack, implying that his remarks were laced with "obvious sarcasm."

I'm dizzy and nauseated by the amount of times Wright is cliff-diving, flip-flopping and twisting himself into a bone-breaking pretzel to have every angle of this leachate-scented take covered. Dude has gone beyond dying on a hill. He has descended into the Underworld and trapped his soul in one of the most bafflingly dumb talking points you could ever think up.

In other news, the Suns are up 2-0 in this second-round series and are the prohibitive favorite to represent the Western Conference in the NBA Finals for a second straight year. Apparently, Wright is going to cover the remainder of this postseason kicking and screaming if Chris Paul, Devin Booker and Phoenix's perimeter players deploy pick-and-rolls too often at hapless defenders.

Hell, even the Mavs' own head coach is calling out Doncic's piss-poor defense.