Jalen Ramsey Out For 6-8 Weeks - Someone Kill Me

Well what do you know, the Dolphins are fucked before the season even starts. What else is new? This team has to be cursed. They need to move their stadium off the Indian burial ground that they built it on because there’s no other logical explanation for how this happens every fucking year. 

It’s pathetic man. I’ve watched this team for 23 years (my whole life) and have never seen them win a playoff game. Now we’re missing our best player for who knows how long and I'm distraught. 

The first report was said he’ll only miss the beginning of the season, but now it could be as late as December. Why did I have to open my big mouth?? I truly believed this year would be different, but one day in and it’s not. 

I’m not mad at Jalen- you can’t control injuries. But I’m mad at myself for loving this team so much. What fucking moron would think it can be different when the last 23 years have been hell? It’s like a toxic relationship, you want it to work but it never will. And the worst part is you can’t get a divorce. I’m stuck with this team for the rest of my life, and I’d die before I stop rooting for the Dolphins, but for the love of God PLEASE give me one good year before I die.

Our team is still fucking loaded, I’m just devastated. How can you not be? All I know is pain and suffering. I’d donate my ball sack to see the Dolphins win just one Super Bowl. Fuck, maybe even just a playoff game. 

In all seriousness, Jalen is the best player on our defense but we also have the most depth at the cornerback position. Undrafted rookie Kader Kohu stepped in last year and played phenomenal. The Dolphins also invested a 2nd round pick in Cam Smith who was an absolute dawg at South Carolina. Losing Jalen is a kick in the dick but I have confidence that Xavien Howard, Kader Kohu, and Cam Smith to hold it down. If any of those 3 guys get hurt just put me down like Ol' Yeller.